The genetics of cheating

OMG! Do we really have to turn the question of why men cheat on their wives…err…significant others…into a matter of science? Scientists at Karolinska Institute in Stockholm are running studies on the genetics of cheating. They’re kidding, aren’t they? They claim to have found an allele in voles who cheat (honest, I don’t know how a vole can “cheat”) and the same allele in men who cheat. I have to admit, I’ve been tempted to call men – or women – who cheat “vermin”, but I think these Swedish guys in the white coats are going a bit too far.

So…We’re so inept in figuring out the human condition that we’re running scientific studies to find out why we succumb to temptation?

Dear Scientists of the Karolinska Institute,

I have a solution for your studies on the genetics of cheating that will save you big bucks. In fact, with the money you’ll save, you can take your wives on a 10-week cruise to the Bahamas. You don’t need any equipment, you don’t even need a laboratory. All you need is a quite, comfy place and a volume called The Bible. Look in the chapter entitled Genesis. The gene you’re looking for is called original sin. The cure for the disease is found in the chapter called Exodus; the syrum is called The Ten Commandments. The process for the syrum to work is called prayer.

I’m sure you’ll find the above materials and formulas helpful to you in your work and wish you well in your studies.

Sincerely,
Margaret A. Fenelon

P.S. Women cheat on their partners, too. Maybe you can work that into your next study.

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