Conversion of St. Paul: “Who Are You, Sir?”

The conversion story of St. Paul is dramatic and makes for a good read. It’s not every day that our Lord himself appears and knocks someone off a horse. It’s even more intriguing that the someone who gets knocked off the horse is an avowed murderer.

St. Paul was a Jewish Pharisee who spent his time and energy riding through villages and hauling Christian men, women, and children out into the streets and slaughtering them with his sword. Cruel as it is, Paul solidly believed that he was doing a good and noble thing. The Christians, in his view, were blasphemers and idolaters who needed to be executed to protect and preserve the faith.

Then something amazing happened that changed all that.

Paul was traveling to Damascus, on his way to kill more Christians, when Jesus appeared to him and literally knocked him off his high horse.

“On that journey as I drew near to Damascus,
about noon a great light from the sky suddenly shone around me.
I fell to the ground and heard a voice saying to me,
‘Saul, Saul, why are you persecuting me?’
I replied, ‘Who are you, sir?’
And he said to me,
‘I am Jesus the Nazorean whom you are persecuting.’
My companions saw the light
but did not hear the voice of the one who spoke to me.
I asked, ‘What shall I do, sir?’
The Lord answered me, ‘Get up and go into Damascus,
and there you will be told about everything
appointed for you to do.’
Since I could see nothing because of the brightness of that light,
I was led by hand by my companions and entered Damascus. (Acts 22:8-11)

In this little scene, there are three details worth noting, and certainly worth meditating upon.

1. Paul asks, “Who are you, sir?” Of course, Paul is wondering who was talking to him, especially since he couldn’t see the person speaking and his companions couldn’t hear the voice. But we should be asking the same question. Who are you, sir? Who is Jesus to me? What kind of relationship do I have with him? This would be an especially powerful spiritual exercise if done in the context of Eucharistic Adoration. Imagine sitting before our Lord in his Real Presence – Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity – and asking him, “Who are you, sir?” Oh, the things that will fill your heart when you do that! As he did with Paul, Jesus will tell you who he is to you. You need only to listen.
2. Only Paul hears the voice. That’s because the voice was meant only for him, just as the voice you hear is meant only for you. When our Lord speaks to you in the depths of your soul, he speaks in a manner that is meant solely for you, and which only you will be able to understand. It’s as if he made up a brand new language just for you. That voice isn’t meant for anyone else, so they won’t be able to hear it.
3. Paul was led by hand by his companions. While the voice is meant just for you, the journey is not. We all are part of the Body of Christ, and for that reason are interdependent on one another. In Christ, we are bound together. What one does affects the others, and what the others do affects the one. We are communal beings, and we need each other. We can’t make it along our faith journey without companions – family, friends, spiritual advisors, our parish community, the Church at large – to take our hand from time to time and lead us to the next stop on our journey.

I love the story of Paul’s conversion for its dramatic and historical aspects. But I also love it for its faith aspects and the message it bears for all Christians.

Every single day, we need to ask ourselves, “Who is Jesus to me?” Every single day, we need to clear out the noise in our heads and hearts and listen to the pure, sweet voice of our Savior, renewing, our relationship with him. That voice will be meant only for us and will be in a language only we can understand. No one else can hear the voice of the Lord speaking to you and no one else can understand the language in which he’s speaking to you. Additionally, every single day, we need to put aside our pride and allow trustworthy, godly companions to take our hand and help us along on the next step in our journey.

Finally, you and I should daily repeat the words of St. Paul, “What shall I do, sir?” The answer will be different for every one of us.